Peace....

So, I believe.

That's just it.  I believe.

Had a complex professional situation and opportunity filled with roadblocks.  All coming to a head today.  Spent hours last week deep into new ways to see solutions, better angles on the problems, looked at it from high and low and everything in between. Still stuck.  Still unsure.  Still not believing.

Then, Easter.  Family.  Blessings.

Then, unexpected suicide of a professional in Virginia's legislative system.  Swept by disbelief, stunned by his young age, aching for his family.  Never knew him....Tedd did.....but the shock and sadness, after such a blessed Easter weekend, was the contrast my brain needed.

To bring me back to belief.

My opportunity filled with roadblocks didn't disappear.  But my compacted, narrow, intensely-owned, attempting-to-control mind finally released.  I let go.  The swing from Easter to suicide to faith was sure and swift.  The peace in my heart was solid.  Just......there.  No rational reason.  But no questions from me. Just acceptance of the peace that was from.....somewhere else.  A blessing given to me and one I accepted.

And the roadblock.....disappeared.  Because I let go, because I accepted, because I believed.

Yellow socks, keep me walking in that faith.

Intensity....

Some days....or weeks....are amazingly intense. Some days....seem like weeks when the intensity is too much.  I was reminded today, that stepping back, stepping out, connecting with family and love....is necessary.

Too many times it's easy to fall into the trap of just reacting, just doing, just moving....and not thinking about the long-term and what really matters.  Eleven hours of back-to-back-to-back meetings and calls and barriers and personnel issues and mountains seeming to block the way....

.....until.....I spent a wonderful 45 minutes at a sports bar with Tedd....and another hour at Maundy Thursday services with mom....and then came home to some beautiful pictures on Laura's blog.  All of it...centering me, reminding me that life is more than work; work is what I do so that I can live life fully.

Ah, the yellow socks.  Tucked right by my nightstand, visible when these intense days seem to overwhelm.  Reminder....that a day passes and is gone forever, so walk in the yellow socks first and find the real meaning of life.  Walking.....

Life transitions

So last Thursday evening, quietly and in the safe, warm  darkness of the night, a professional friend of mine slipped away from this earth and into His peace.  Mark was a funny, kind, steady, quiet professional who, from all accounts in the newspaper, lived a full life centered around his family.  He only knew of his shortened time on this earth for a few weeks.  He left us better for having known him.

As with the important happenings in life, his departure was touched by a higher being, in ways that reached out to others.  As news of Mark's death spread, news of the birth of another team member's grandson also came to light.  The baby, born within the 24 hours of Mark's passing, was shown to us as a close-up picture of a baby, snuggled and wrapped with a blue head-cap and a little smile on his face.  He was, to me, evidence of the hand of God, completing the circle of life in the little part of the world in which I am blessed to abide.

And today, blessings from Mark's life and death continued.  The rain gently covered our community; I see in rain, the hope of renewal and I believe that it is a sign of love and peace when it happens at the time of a major life event....birth, death, marriage.  The sign that our God is providing, and guiding, and watching.

And then, another sign.  Sitting a separate computers in two different rooms of our house, Tedd and I each found an article about the end of life and going gently into the next world.  I printed the article for Tedd, he bookmarked it for me, we laughed lightly when we both realized our minds had melded from different rooms,  and in that loving coincidence, a higher being spoke again.

Go gently, Mark, you have touched us.  Walk in the yellow socks.

Miracles.....

The topic of today's sermon was "Miracles".  And, in another example of how miracles work, the pastor asked each of us to take at least 30 minutes sometime today to "write - in a journal, in a letter, in an email - just write about the miracles in your life".  Wow.  Why is this a miracle at work for me?  Because, what did I just start  doing yesterday....blogging.

I've believed all my life that there are signs that point the way, if we'll just take time to see them in our lives.  These are my daily miracles.  And his call to action, in today's sermon, was one of those miracles.  There is a purpose yet unseen for the words I write.  I may never know that purpose, but I believe.

Our pastor told us today of his most recent miracle.  Our pastor is.....well.....eclectic and creative, fundamental and loving, focused and encompassing.  He and his wife use their homeplace as a refuge for injured or unusual wild animals.  Giraffes, lions, monkeys, donkeys, you name it, he probably has cared for it at some point.  Most recently, it was a beautiful, wild, white tiger cub.  Which tragically, died about 3 months after they were given it to care for.  He and his wife have mourned and prayed...and today, he told us that the Sandusky Zoo called and asked if he would be willing to take a white tiger cub, one of several born recently.  He'll be traveling to Sandusky today, and tomorrow at 1PM will start the return home with this animal, whose life will now be part of his ministry.

My miracle today?  News that my cousin Deb, who just completed her chemo treatments, also successfully applied for and won a new job in her company!  Deb has struggled this past year, her doubt and pain often more overwhelming than she thought she could bear.  Her sisters and brothers lifted her up; her friends gave her strength; and the Lord carried her when it seemed there was no hope.  Deb is blessed and I pray that her faith journey, so tested in this past year, will  be a visible light to her to believe...in miracles.

So yes, every day in every way, there are miracles.  We just need to open our eyes and hearts, and see and believe.  Continue walking in your yellow socks....

Day One....Blogging....

Well, do I have the courage of the yellow socks, to begin and maintain a blog?  And if I do, what is the purpose?  (Always begin with the end in mind.....).

So, sitting in my (too cool for April) house....thinking that my dad's yellow socks should be an inspiration.  The gave him a unique attitude, one that helped him live a life full of....joy, sorrow, laughter, tears...he wrote editorials on issues of great significance to the country and his home city....and he took movies of great hilarity and fun that live on in our families' lives.  Yellow socks filled him with courage for the day and gave him armor to face whatever came his way.

My blog is the outcome of yellow socks.  I want to comment on the times of this life.....I want to comment on issues of great significance and great hilarity.  And to incorporate the loves of my life, family and faith and work, with respect and courage.

Yellow socks. Thanks, Dad, for the inspiration.  I love you.

Yellow Socks....What the Heck does THAT mean?

Yellow socks were my dad's signature piece of clothing.  For as long as I knew him, he wore them around the house, with and without shoes....a way for him to express independence, I suppose, and humor, and a love of life that ran deep in his soul.

Yellow socks.  He took them with him when he was buried.  As a surprise, I guess we thought, when he met his maker, who gave him this humor.

Yellow socks.  Whenever I need to readjust my attitude, or see the real meaning of life, or find a way to get through a tough situation, I think of my dad.  And his yellow socks.